Saturday, February 27, 2010

My leg is hurting again. This is bullshit.
I'm sitting in the grocery store bathroom crying like a baby wondering how I'm going to finish shopping. I am so sick of this . I've felt so great the past 2 weeks then bam. I wake up and can barely walk. Fml.

Saturday, February 20, 2010

Kind of random, but I just realized none of my clothing fits.

I've lost about 50 lbs and didn't even notice.

I am battling some wicked insomnia. I havent slept in about 5 days.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

I feel much better. Tired, but better. I'm still working on the kitchen, getting things re-organized and scrubbed. Tomorrow I'm going to reline the cabinets and drawers, and beg Jason to help me scrub the floor.

He gets aggravated with me sometimes because when I want something done, I want it done RIGHT THAT SECOND. If he won't help me right when I ask, I just do it myself.

But, right now, I dont know how long my pain will be gone. Steroid injections are dangerous, and I'm not sure how long I can take them or how long I will even WANT to. Or how long they will even work. So, in my head, I'm in "Everything must be done NAO while I feel ok"


Wednesday, February 17, 2010

My vagina is broken

Without going into too much detail - I've got a nasty discharge going on. The same thing is coming out of my ears, and eyes. It's green, and gross.

Adding to the list - eye dr and lady dr.

Saw rhuematologist - I got cortisone shots in my knees and shoulder and WOOOOOW did they hurt. I actually almost passed out during the first one and they had to stop.

But, today I feel so much better. SO MUCH BETTER.

Monday, February 15, 2010


This  week a crazy man walked into Penske and shot 5 people. My husband and I knew 4 of these people personally. We've spent great amounts of time with them and their families at their homes.
2 died, and one who died was one of my husbands closest friends.
Another is paralyzed. Another is still uncertain, but as he was shot multiple times in the head, it's not looking great.

I do not write this to take away or diminish the families grieving or what they are going through, I know nothing I am going through can remotely come close to what they are going through.

That said, the stress of all of this is taking a nasty toll on me. I'm and worse than I have been since this started. I can't help but think whatever is going on stress induced or stress is somehow making it worse.